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Indiana Jones
AKA Leslie. Between adventures, Indy doubles as the camp counselor of Treetops 235. The better half of The
Thing, she can often be found keeping the retarded masses that live here in line.
And if you ever need someone to put lotion on your back, there is no one better. I swear to fucking god she was
coating my back one day and I uh, hm, wow. You gotta try it.
Tits McGee
She's what you do to a drunken sailor. Earl-ly in the morning.
Blaker
Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life son.
2L
2L comes into a the house at a time when we are currently between Lawyers. Being a law student makes her our next
best alternative. We've just got to cross our fingers that Kidnapping and sodomy are two of her specialties.
Chipper
The culmination of five generations of pure breeding amongst the finest that DC has to offer, Chipper is by far the most
dignified of this Motley Crew. The man doesn't pop his collar; the damn things just wont go down. Rumor has it
that his semen in monogrammed.
I once saw Chipper drinking a Pina Colada at Trader Vic's. His hair was perfect.
The guy with the tight, stripped shirt
Jeff is the mute member of the house. He enjoys playing golf and wearing shirts three times smaller than his actual
size.
The Apprentice
A strong preseason rookie showing gleaned Jim an invitation to play with the band this summer. The Thing's apprentice,
also the youngest of the Nubbins, looks to establish himself in the Dewey Beach annals. While what he should really
be doing is trying to stay alive and keeping his head on a swivel.
The Thing
He was transformed into an orange colored, thick-skinned, heavily muscled, and superhumanly strong "Thing."
Over the years, the mutations to "The Thing's" body have continued to progress slowly. The composition of his epidermis changed
from an abnormally dense to somewhat lumpy, but is still comparatively smooth hide to a flexible, interlocking network of
rock-like lumps. His superhuman strength increased considerably over time. Early in his life as "The Thing," he would
sometimes revert to his original human form unexpectedly. Appalled by his appearance, he was at first filled with
anger at the situation, but eventually became resigned to his fate. He continues to be disturbed by his appearance
and to hopes for a means of regaining his human form that will last.
Dirty Mag
Dirty Mag hangs out with Kyle Boller. What does that mean? It means that he is better than you.
LL
She never should have been let out of that fucking well.
Legs
Mel and her alternate personality "Legs" are a great dynamic. Mel is cool, laid back, and chill, but put some alcohol
in her and "Legs" comes out in full force, literally. Give this girl a little whip cream and a camera, and you will
be seeing a lot more than you bargained for.
And she's a teacher. Seriously. This is why China is such a threat.
Sammy Blunt
Sam is 30 year old unemployed and unmarried albino, who lives in a basement apartment with no windows. He is scared
of lighting.
Shut the Fuck Up
When talking to Shut the Fuck Up in public, it is always good to remember one key thing: Do not let her manuever
you, so that you have your back against an unmovable object. Shut the Fuck Up is known as the deadliest close-talker
in the universe. You think I'm kidding, huh? Fuck you then, try it...I dare you.
Sean
Sean played Division II arena football for the Alabama Porch Monkeys. So, what does that mean? Well Dingleberry,
that means that no one has ever heard of Sean or seen him before. Which is why there is a pic of the BOZ. Stone
Cold was one of the best movies ever.
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